Guilty as charged!

On the 4^th of July 2014, the nation of France was left in shock as a teacher was stabbed to death by the mother of one of her pupils in front of her class. The end of school’s results had been released but her daughter’s performance was below par. When she was apprehended by the police, she shouted repeatedly, “I am not a thief”.

As extreme as that sounds, it happens everytime we engage in the sin of gossip (Romans 1:29-30) and slander (Leviticus 19:16). Gossip leads to character assassination and robs people of   the beauty of being known on a first hand basis. Gossip smears and being spiritual does not absolve us from relating to people based on what we have heard about them. This puts a lid on our relationships(1 Samuel 24:9) ,causes strife and spreads discord which God hates(Proverbs 6:16,19;20:26 ) .Rather than bringing knowledge(Malachi 2:6-7 ),our lips serve as tools in the hand of the enemy.With so many ill-effects why do we still engage in this vice?

 First of all, it is pleasurable. Something about the human nature wants to know that all is not as well with the Joneses as portrayed. This may be linked to jealously. Idleness ( 1 Timothy 5:13) may be breeding ground  for gossip coupled with the fact that it is harder to pray than to gossip. Resentment and unforgiveness often serve as baits for gossip. Moreover we may be reluctant to participate in the drudgery of working out our relationships (James 3:18 MSG) and resort to verbal bullying .It may also be a method of vindictiveness as a result of malice.

The temptation to engage in gossip is real and varies for different individuals. Women being more relational tend to be more prone although the menfolk are not immune. Regular cross examination of our hearts and motives is a priority if we must gain the upper hand. We can consciously also remove ourselves from situations that lead to gossip and avoid being alone with known gossips. To prevent idle talk, phone calls should be purposeful and our visitations strategic. The insatiable need to know everything possible about everyone should be stiffened. Rather we should make it our business to be involved intimately only with those we truly care about. As a rule, if we are not part of the problem or solution, then we might as well keep our mouths shut.

Gossip need not be false to cause harm. Listening to gossip is as much evil as spreading it. Our words about others is a reflection of  honour  and  should be incubated in enough love to cover their weaknesses with the knowledge that we still have our own struggles which we would prefer hidden. Let us also honour God always knowing he listens to our every conversation (Malachi 3:16a).

Yours in His  Service,
Grace Tom-Lawyer

NB:This is a more comprehensive version of the previous post-Juicy bits..sour aftertaste.

Juicy bits.....sour aftertaste!

On the 4^th of July, the nation of France was left in shock as a teacher was stabbed to death by the mother of one of her pupils in front of her class. The end of year results had just been released and her daughter’s performance was poor.

As extreme as that was, it happens everytime we engage in the sin of gossip and slander (Leviticus 19:16, Psalms 31:13). Gossip can kill suddenly or slowly as its cancerous tentacles spread around. It was through gossip and misrepresentation of facts that the Pharisees were able to present a reason to kill Jesus (Matthew 26:61). Nothing causes discord (Proverbs 6:16, 19) or stirs strife (Proverbs 26:20) like gossip. It halts (Numbers 12:15; 1-3) and damages (Proverbs 16:28;18:8,21) relationships and subsequently robs us of the beauty of relating to people on a first hand basis (1 Samuel 24:9).It also leaves no place for grace for the weaknesses of others as well as dethrones God of his right to be judge. God is dishonoured when we gossip (Psalms 50:19-21, Malachi 2:5-7). 

Gossip is like cancer,everyone involved  is hurt.

  

Recognizing and avoiding situations when we are most tempted to gossip is wisdom (Proverbs 18:6-8, 1 Corinthians 5:11).Our words are a reflection of our hearts. Regular examination of our motives and hearts can place a check on the sin of gossiping (Romans 1:29-30). It may be that we need to rid it of malice, pride and jealousy (Psalms 101:5).

 Finally, make it your business to mind your business #MIYB2MYB (1 Timothy 5:13).

 Grace Tom-Lawyer

Living a life of Gratitude 5:the Benefits.

The decision to live a life of gratitude is immensely rewarding and a choice we must make daily. It goes beyond being optimistic and confers the responsibility of looking at what we have so we can count our many blessings. In expressing gratitude, both the one who expresses and the recipient are refreshed.
 

Gratitude ushers us into the presence of God (Psalms 100:4; 22:4). An atmosphere of gratitude is conducive for miracles (John 11:42, Mark 6:41). Gratitude obeys the law of sowing and reaping .The more gratitude we sow, the more we are likely to see more to be grateful for or be given more to be grateful for. The leper who returned to give thanks was not just healed but made whole (Luke 17:11-18).
 

Secondly, it is safe to also say that gratitude serves as the platform from which we can make further requests (Philippians 4:6). Most times unfortunately like the Israelites, what was once a miracle soon becomes the reason for complaining (Exodus 16:11-16; Numbers 11:6). There is no need to ask God for more if we are not grateful for what we presently have.
 

Thirdly, gratitude keeps discouragement at bay (Psalms 42:5). It reminds us of the goodness of God, engages our trust in his abilities and averts despair (Psalms 27:13). Living a life of gratitude reduces stress, especially from unnecessary competition or envy (2 Corinthians 10:12). The spirit of covetousness is usually halted by gratitude. It is a sure forerunner of peace (Philippians 4:6-7; Colossians 3:15).
 

Fourthly, gratitude enhances our relationship with others. People feel appreciated and receive a boost to their self-esteem when we express gratitude. This not only puts them at ease but makes us more attractive and sociable. Sometimes a compliment is all it takes to turn a stranger into a friend (Ruth 3:11; 1 Samuel 25:28). As we recognize the contributions of others, we are kept from pride and hence afforded the boon of being humble. God resists the proud (James 4:6) and people are not generally willing to do more for the person who loves to take all the credit.
 

Finally, a life of gratitude ensures we are not robbed of the beauty of the present. Being set free by it, we can enjoy the now without being stuck in the “good old days” or an “anticipated future" (Psalms 118:24).Life’s frustrations are more bearable with an attitude of gratitude.
 

Gratitude is a seasoning. It permeates all aspects of our lives. Nothing enriches our lives or relationships like a grateful spirit. Memories become pleasant when filled with gratitude. We should be grateful for both the spectacular and the seemingly ordinary. If we cultivate and nurture this attitude, we will be recipients of its multi-faceted benefits.

Remain grateful,

Grace Tom-Lawyer