Error of Balaam 10-The Error of Sef -deceit

31Then the Lord opened Balaam’s eyes, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.

32 The angel of the Lord asked him, “Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me.[a] 33 The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If it had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared it.”

34 Balaam said to the angel of the Lord, “I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back.” Numbers 22:31-34 NIV New International Version

After Balaam left with the second delegation from Balak, he was opposed by the angel whom he did not see initially. He became frustrated by the unexplainable behaviour of the donkey and responded to what he did not understand by the use of violence and abuse. He actually considered killing the donkey until his eyes were eventually opened to see the angel .The angel rebuked Balaam for being abusive to the donkey who was trying to save his life. There are so many times we erroneously think that people and things that are not working our way are `evil .The reality is that some oppositions we face may not be from the enemy but it might just be God's way of saving us from further harm. .Balaam's ignorance was no excuse for his abuse of his donkey and the ensuing conversation with the angel reveals yet another error.

  Balaam followed the notions by worshipping the angel when he saw him. This angel appears to be the Lord as there is no record of the angel  rebuking this act of worship. There have been other appearances in the Old Testament that refer to the angel with subsequent unrebuked / unhindered worship by individuals(  Judges 13:3-23,Joshua 5:13-15 ).He was ready to do the outward display of submission without really totally submitting as the latter part of his answer reveals.

"I have sinned. I did not realize you were standing in the road to oppose me. Now if you are displeased, I will go back.” ( italics mine for emphasis)

He started well right by saying that he had sinned but his confession did not automatically translate to repentance. It is not enough to confess if we are not going to make amends(Proverbs 28:13) and ironically, the last part of his statement shows that Balaam is in a sort of denial and the error here which we are also guilty of from time to time is that of self deceit. According to the Free Dictionary , Self deceit is the act or an instance of deceiving oneself, especially as to the true nature of one’s feelings or motives.It was no secret that God did not want Balaam to go in the first place but because his motives was getting the divination money at all cost(2 Peter 2:15-16,Jude 1:11).

Living in self deceit may also be a case of having a form of godliness but denying the power therefore (2 Timothy 3:5).It may also be denying the power of the grace of God (Titus 2:11-13) to say no to certain things we are sure of are not his will for us. Usually this would require an amount of sacrifice which our flesh usually does not want to do (Galatians 5:17).

We all have a tendency towards self deceit because sometimes the truth is too painful to face and at other times we have our own personal agenda and do not want to go all the way. We may be living in denial of our actual state but for there to be true healing and progress,  the truth must be faced and with the help of God this is possible.

Yours in His Service,

Grace Tom-Lawyer