Guilty as charged!

On the 4^th of July 2014, the nation of France was left in shock as a teacher was stabbed to death by the mother of one of her pupils in front of her class. The end of school’s results had been released but her daughter’s performance was below par. When she was apprehended by the police, she shouted repeatedly, “I am not a thief”.

As extreme as that sounds, it happens everytime we engage in the sin of gossip (Romans 1:29-30) and slander (Leviticus 19:16). Gossip leads to character assassination and robs people of   the beauty of being known on a first hand basis. Gossip smears and being spiritual does not absolve us from relating to people based on what we have heard about them. This puts a lid on our relationships(1 Samuel 24:9) ,causes strife and spreads discord which God hates(Proverbs 6:16,19;20:26 ) .Rather than bringing knowledge(Malachi 2:6-7 ),our lips serve as tools in the hand of the enemy.With so many ill-effects why do we still engage in this vice?

 First of all, it is pleasurable. Something about the human nature wants to know that all is not as well with the Joneses as portrayed. This may be linked to jealously. Idleness ( 1 Timothy 5:13) may be breeding ground  for gossip coupled with the fact that it is harder to pray than to gossip. Resentment and unforgiveness often serve as baits for gossip. Moreover we may be reluctant to participate in the drudgery of working out our relationships (James 3:18 MSG) and resort to verbal bullying .It may also be a method of vindictiveness as a result of malice.

The temptation to engage in gossip is real and varies for different individuals. Women being more relational tend to be more prone although the menfolk are not immune. Regular cross examination of our hearts and motives is a priority if we must gain the upper hand. We can consciously also remove ourselves from situations that lead to gossip and avoid being alone with known gossips. To prevent idle talk, phone calls should be purposeful and our visitations strategic. The insatiable need to know everything possible about everyone should be stiffened. Rather we should make it our business to be involved intimately only with those we truly care about. As a rule, if we are not part of the problem or solution, then we might as well keep our mouths shut.

Gossip need not be false to cause harm. Listening to gossip is as much evil as spreading it. Our words about others is a reflection of  honour  and  should be incubated in enough love to cover their weaknesses with the knowledge that we still have our own struggles which we would prefer hidden. Let us also honour God always knowing he listens to our every conversation (Malachi 3:16a).

Yours in His  Service,
Grace Tom-Lawyer

NB:This is a more comprehensive version of the previous post-Juicy bits..sour aftertaste.

Juicy bits.....sour aftertaste!

On the 4^th of July, the nation of France was left in shock as a teacher was stabbed to death by the mother of one of her pupils in front of her class. The end of year results had just been released and her daughter’s performance was poor.

As extreme as that was, it happens everytime we engage in the sin of gossip and slander (Leviticus 19:16, Psalms 31:13). Gossip can kill suddenly or slowly as its cancerous tentacles spread around. It was through gossip and misrepresentation of facts that the Pharisees were able to present a reason to kill Jesus (Matthew 26:61). Nothing causes discord (Proverbs 6:16, 19) or stirs strife (Proverbs 26:20) like gossip. It halts (Numbers 12:15; 1-3) and damages (Proverbs 16:28;18:8,21) relationships and subsequently robs us of the beauty of relating to people on a first hand basis (1 Samuel 24:9).It also leaves no place for grace for the weaknesses of others as well as dethrones God of his right to be judge. God is dishonoured when we gossip (Psalms 50:19-21, Malachi 2:5-7). 

Gossip is like cancer,everyone involved  is hurt.

  

Recognizing and avoiding situations when we are most tempted to gossip is wisdom (Proverbs 18:6-8, 1 Corinthians 5:11).Our words are a reflection of our hearts. Regular examination of our motives and hearts can place a check on the sin of gossiping (Romans 1:29-30). It may be that we need to rid it of malice, pride and jealousy (Psalms 101:5).

 Finally, make it your business to mind your business #MIYB2MYB (1 Timothy 5:13).

 Grace Tom-Lawyer

Living a life of Gratitude 5:the Benefits.

The decision to live a life of gratitude is immensely rewarding and a choice we must make daily. It goes beyond being optimistic and confers the responsibility of looking at what we have so we can count our many blessings. In expressing gratitude, both the one who expresses and the recipient are refreshed.
 

Gratitude ushers us into the presence of God (Psalms 100:4; 22:4). An atmosphere of gratitude is conducive for miracles (John 11:42, Mark 6:41). Gratitude obeys the law of sowing and reaping .The more gratitude we sow, the more we are likely to see more to be grateful for or be given more to be grateful for. The leper who returned to give thanks was not just healed but made whole (Luke 17:11-18).
 

Secondly, it is safe to also say that gratitude serves as the platform from which we can make further requests (Philippians 4:6). Most times unfortunately like the Israelites, what was once a miracle soon becomes the reason for complaining (Exodus 16:11-16; Numbers 11:6). There is no need to ask God for more if we are not grateful for what we presently have.
 

Thirdly, gratitude keeps discouragement at bay (Psalms 42:5). It reminds us of the goodness of God, engages our trust in his abilities and averts despair (Psalms 27:13). Living a life of gratitude reduces stress, especially from unnecessary competition or envy (2 Corinthians 10:12). The spirit of covetousness is usually halted by gratitude. It is a sure forerunner of peace (Philippians 4:6-7; Colossians 3:15).
 

Fourthly, gratitude enhances our relationship with others. People feel appreciated and receive a boost to their self-esteem when we express gratitude. This not only puts them at ease but makes us more attractive and sociable. Sometimes a compliment is all it takes to turn a stranger into a friend (Ruth 3:11; 1 Samuel 25:28). As we recognize the contributions of others, we are kept from pride and hence afforded the boon of being humble. God resists the proud (James 4:6) and people are not generally willing to do more for the person who loves to take all the credit.
 

Finally, a life of gratitude ensures we are not robbed of the beauty of the present. Being set free by it, we can enjoy the now without being stuck in the “good old days” or an “anticipated future" (Psalms 118:24).Life’s frustrations are more bearable with an attitude of gratitude.
 

Gratitude is a seasoning. It permeates all aspects of our lives. Nothing enriches our lives or relationships like a grateful spirit. Memories become pleasant when filled with gratitude. We should be grateful for both the spectacular and the seemingly ordinary. If we cultivate and nurture this attitude, we will be recipients of its multi-faceted benefits.

Remain grateful,

Grace Tom-Lawyer

Living a life of Gratitude 4:gratitude to people

“Thus the children of Israel did not remember the Lord their God, who had delivered them from the hands of all their enemies on every side; neither did they show kindness to the house of Jerubaal (Gideon) in accordance with the good he had done for Israel”. Judges 8:34-35.New King James Version.

Although Gideon had risked his life as he fought for the children of Israel against the Midianites, his seventy sons save one were killed by his beneficiaries when he died in a conspiracy(Judges 9). But it is interesting to note that the Bible first records that it was because they did not show gratitude to God that they were unable to show gratitude to Gideon. Relationships thrive better where gratitude is present. Our gratitude to God serves as a platform from which we can show gratitude to people. We may do this so well to strangers but the truly courteous person is the person who is courteous at home.

Most of us first learn how to express gratitude in our homes when we start learning how to use the magic words. As we grew older, the grunts of adolescence slipped into adulthood and often we find ourselves bereft of showing gratitude to the people who matter the most. It is necessary then to retrace our steps as we may inadvertently be taking our family members for granted. Children should be taught to express thanks at home, for meals, chauffeur and laundry services to mention a few. As models, we should also show gratitude to children and allow them see us expressing gratitude to our own parents.

Gratitude to our elderly parents can be expressed by inquiring after their welfare regularly. We should give to them regularly commensurate to our income rather than using the fire brigade approach. Neither should we equate these material gifts with our presence. It is foolishness to suddenly have enough time and money for a burial ceremony when they are no longer around. Many of such ostentatious ceremonies have been driven more by guilt than care.

Our friends should also be shown gratitude. Calling them only when we need a favour might be an indication that they are being taken for granted. On a regular basis, we should let our friends know that we appreciate their friendship. Helping them to achieve some of their goals while celebrating their achievements is also showing gratitude.

It is also courteous to express thanks to people regardless of their social class. Not only should doctors or teachers be appreciated but waitresses and bus drivers.Our Pastors also need to be appreciated.Giving back to the society via voluntary work or taxes is showing gratitude.

Our ability to show gratitude to God is a prerequisite for showing gratitude to others. Gratitude is not only a preserver but an enhancer of   relationships. The benefits are immeasurable and saying “Thank you” daily can be a catalyst for improved relationships.

Remain Grateful,

Grace Tom-lawyer

Living a life of Gratitude 3:gratitude to God

“I will always thank the Lord, I will never stop praising him” .Psalms 34:1 Good News Translation.

“Whatever happens, give thanks, because it is God’s will in Christ Jesus that you do this”.1 Thessalonians 5:18 God’s Word Translation.

In our pursuit of living a life of gratitude daily, gratitude to God must become a foremost priority but the peculiarity of showing gratitude to an invisible God may pose challenges and certain religious ideas may have reduced it to become associated only with the grace before meals or bedtime prayers.   


We can show our gratitude to God for the life we have by living it to the fullest. Every day should be received with excitement as a present perfectly packaged and delivered to us (Psalms 68:19). The uniqueness of our being means that we have all been specially wired by the manufacturer with particular gifts and talents. The usage of these gifts and talents bestowed on us coupled with a healthy love for ourselves is another way of expressing our gratitude to God. Envying others and playing the comparison game may actually be a sign of ingratitude.

Taking care of our bodies by not moving to the extremes under the guise of dieting, exercising, medication, work, recreation, eating and drinking is another way of showing our gratitude to God. Also putting the very best in our work shows that we are grateful to God that He has provided us with a means of sustenance and increase .Taking the time to develop our minds and improving our intellect also signifies gratitude. Telling others of the goodness of God and the change he has made in our life is another means of expression. 

Singing songs of praise which sometimes are Psalms is a well-known method of giving God thanks. However a closer look at the Psalms show the writers were specific about things they were grateful for (Psalms 103:3, 4; 104:13-15). The more specific thanksgiving is, the more meaningful and personal it becomes. We can also imitate these ancient saints by having a written record of the good things God does for us. I do have one which I call my “Thanksgiving diary” and the blessedness of going through it at times when I am down is unparalleled. I encourage you to start keeping one today. This is because there are times when we may not be able to trace God but by means of such records, we are able to recall all that He has done in the past which then serves as a springboard for our faith and prayers. 

Our goal should be to make our lives an ongoing expression of gratitude to God. In developing this attitude, we need to be intentional and consistent. Sometimes having reminders or prompts during the day to stop and thank God can help in achieving this goal. This is because a life of gratitude is not optional, it is the way to truly live.
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Yours in Him,

Grace Tom-Lawyer

The Perfect Father:the Father of Mercies

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort,”- 2 Corinthians 1:3
"I will be a Father to you,and you shall be my sons and daughter says the Lord Almighty."2 Corinthians 6:18  New King James Version  

I sometimes babysit a five year old girl whose parents are divorced. She is quite chatty and so recently, I enquired about her day at her mother’s place. She informed me that her mother’s car broke down and her father had driven down to give her mum a lift. Now I know most divorced people do not act like that so I commented on how nice her father is. Her response was quite intriguing. She said “yes I know and I have asked him if I can marry him when I am older”. I laughed and explained to her that she would need to find another man with the good qualities her dad had.

Everyone of us can relate to the mercy that father showed  to his former partner. According to Oxford dictionary, it is a disposition to be kind and forgiving, compassionate or simply put, it means not getting what we deserve. Mercy is such an integral quality of God that the first time He reveals his glory to a man, Moses “as he passed…..he shouted…..the Lord, the Lord God merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth” (Exodus 34:6).The first characteristic mentioned of God here is  that he is merciful. Jeremiah also says about this mercies that they are manufactured new every morning and that his mercy stops us from being destroyed (Lamentations 3:23). The mercy of God also leads to forgiveness of sins (Psalms 51:5), deliverance from death (Psalms 9:13), restoration (Jeremiah 42:12), direction (Isaiah 49:10), healing (Psalms 6:2), answers to prayer (Psalms 4:1) to mention a few.

In Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians, he gives a beautiful description of God. He called him the “father of mercies”. When we say father, we usually mean the originator or the source. This means that all the acts or forms of mercy I have ever received or will ever receive have ultimately come from him .I do not know about you but I have come to the conclusion that I cannot go a day without mercy, hence this father’s day meets me with a new sense of gratitude and obligation. If our father is the father of mercies, then as his children we should also show mercy. In short God requires us to show mercy (Micah 6:8, Matthew 23:23) and showing mercy qualifies us to be recipients of mercy (Matthew 5:7)

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 Perhaps your own memories of your father are far from favourable .He may have been absent, too stern or worse still, abusive and Father’s day celebration brings memories you would prefer not to revisit. But this Father’s day, regardless of how our “earthly fathers” or “father figures” may have acted, I implore us to choose to celebrate a father who is the “Father of mercies” and the source of our sustenance.

Happy Father's Day.

Grace Tom-Lawyer

Timeless Lessons from Pentecost: a promise kept.

Acts 2:1-4- “When the Day of Pentecost had fully come,…and suddenly there came a sound from heaven………and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues ,as the Spirit gave them utterance”.

Acts 2:13-“Others mocking said, “They are full of new wine”.

I recently came across a website that has been set up to attack ministers of God. I could not fathom the theology behind their claims especially as they are Christians. I noticed several accusations but read with interest one about a minister’s service. I remember  watching the particular service online that day and was appalled at how out of context some facts had been presented to defame character. Interestingly  both Moses and the disciples were also faced with this dilemma on the day of Pentecost. 

In the first Pentecost, the Law was given and the nation Israel was birth. However the children of Israel failed to recognize this and quickly began to speak of not knowing what had happened to Moses(Exodus 32).Their misunderstanding and impatience led to the making of the golden calf resulting in idolatry which led to the death of 3,000 men.

In Acts 2, the Holy Spirit was given on the day of Pentecost as the Church was born. Just like fire clouded Mount Sinai, tongues of fire were visible  on the disciples' heads.After Peter’s message, 3,000 men were saved. This move of God did not stop criticism as the disciples were wrongly accused of being drunk. This was by fellow devout  Jews who  obeyed the commandment to come to Jerusalem for the Feast of Weeks but failed to be acquainted with prophecy. A lesson to be learnt is that it is possible to start out right and not be right along the way. Also criticism should not be the response to what we do not understand. Being uncomfortable or unfamiliar with something, be it a style of worship or preaching should not be our ticket to criticize. We may not like the style of the Worship leader but should always remember the worship is not for us but God.

Apostle Peter commendably reminded his critics  that  the outpouring of the Holy Spirit was a promise kept and a fulfilment of prophecy as seen in Joel 2:28-32.Let us learn like the Psalmist to refer people to the Word (Psalms 119:23,42,51). “This is that” Peter replied and arguably most times we are living in the “is” land before the “that” happens but we can count on the faithfulness of God who is capable of fulfilling every promise He has made.Learning to wait is a lesson for all.

 Jesus appeared to about 500 disciples as he departed and told them to wait for the promise of the Father (Acts 1:4) but ten days after, on the day of Pentecost, there were only 120 left in the Upper room, where were the rest? Is it possible that impatience is stopping us from inheriting some of the promises? 

Finally, the celebration of Pentecost is usually a time of thanksgiving for the harvest of Wheat with an offering of the firstfruit ,the Holy Spirit came on this day as the firstfruits of the believer’s inheritance (2 Cor 5:5,Ephesians 1;11,14 ) and so let us all use this season to express gratitude to God for the Holy Spirit.
Keith Green rightly  sang in “There is a Redeemer” verse:
“Thank You O my  Father for giving us Your Son and leaving Your Spirit till the work on earth is done”.

Happy Pentecost Sunday.

Grace Tom-Lawyer

NB
Pentecost comes from the Greek word “Pentekoskte” meaning fifty. It was one of the three annual feasts for which all the males were to appear in Jerusalem(Exodus 23:14-19) .It is also referred to as the Feast of Weeks or Harvest.(Exodus 34:22-23,Leviticus 23:16).